No Tears

No tears, no broken-hearted soliloquies. God’s got this. He's got me covered. I'll be just fine...

I thought I'd be a mess for weeks, months, forever...but mercy said "NO"! I cried out to God, he counted my tears and said "THAT'S ENOUGH"! I feel stronger each day. Through this process I'm learning to allow people to be there for me, to allow myself to be transparent even to myself in order to release and be healed. I'm on the cusp of total peace. I acknowledge the still daily tug at my heart. I embrace the fond memories and even allow myself to reflect on what could have been. I even thank God for this yearning. They let me know that my heart is still open. I want to stay open to the possibilities. Yet I pray that the lessons learned will make me wiser, a bit more pragmatic, and careful.

It's natural. I was created as a woman by God to nurture such longing, such hope for the love of a man and for unborn children. If the woman did not commit to keep the hope flame alive, who would?

But I was never created to feel desperate, insecure, unloveable or heartbroken. God has ordered my steps and I only desire to walk in the path he's prepared for me.

God's way is not popular, fun, or easy but there is safety and protection therein. I want to feel safe and secure in God's unconditional and perfect love. His way is the path for me.