Okay so I have this girlfriend (names will be omitted to protect the innocent) who is a NOTORIOUS snooper!!! I mean this girl is all in her man's email, voice mail, phone bill, you name, she's got the code. As a matter of fact, she has been an expert "code cracker" (Steve Harvey aint got nothing on this chic) since high school.
In any event....the thing with her is that, when she finds the information that she's looking for, she has the audacity to approach her man about it and demand an explanation for her "discovery"!! Now I don't think I would ever be that bold! Wow, she's a straight thug with hers...
I mean THIS chick, man she goes so hard...she will literally blow up the spot knowing she was dead wrong in the first place...I was like "sweetie" you have lost your mind".
I would love to know how the ladies feel about this....the fellas too.
Of course she and the dude broke up, hence the "urgent, call me back" text that I received in the middle of history class today...Was dude justified to break up with her because she's snoopy, even though he was cheating?
This is my place, my space to capture my thoughts, desires, experiences and just let go. Please come in, make yourself comfortable, and comment when moved to; but leave your judgements at the door.
5 comments:
i must admit that the ONE and ONLY time i snopped with my college boyfriend of what 4/5 years was when I "knew" in my heart he was up to no good...and he wasn't...he was in DEED cheating and the only thing me snopping did was CONFIRM what i already knew in my heart...
because if you have to got to snop you already really know what the deal is...
it was over regardless in my situation because he had cheated...he tried to pull the its my personal space/stuff and he was right, and i was dead wrong...two wrongs truly can't and will never make a right so it was in fact in deed over...
so in short they both wrong! but sometimes you just need to "see" it with your own two eyes to believe it...now hopefully she can move forward because now she knows and him saying she was wrong was in part because YES she was for going through his stuff but also in part because its always easier to deflect when you know you are wrong and he KNOWS he is DEAD wrong for cheating!
Well..I actually had a situation where the dude gave me access to his phone bill to take care of some business for him. He caught himself because a week later he changed the password without saying anything to me. LOL! That's when I knew that something was up...
There is a certain degree of vulnerability that comes with being in a relationship. You have to trust your partner. However, if your heart tells you otherwise, them discuss it. If, then, you're still not convinced, then leave. There is no need to be a snooper. If you can't trust your partner, then why be with them. If you're snooping, you don't trust your partner.
I hear you if you don't trust to just leave, but as a woman, we think a little different...i need to see it, i HAVE to comfirm that i was right my instincts were correct...because 9 xs out of 10 you have tried to talk about it before you snop, at least in my casei know i asked, on more than one occasion and asked for him to just be honest...
and he sat there and lied to me straight up and down to my face...
so when the major incident hit, i went through the phone, first and only time...and i learned from that...listen to self...but what happens when self doesn't want to listen? that's when like i said you snop, because you just have to see it...so you can have your closure don't have any "what if i was wrong" type of thoughts and keep it moving
It's funny cause in my case the "evidence" sort of just landed in my lap...(so crazy) and I always wondered would I have ever gotten this information otherwise? Because these peeps were good!!!
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